Fellowship: When your fellow isn't shipshape

Text: "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector. Matthew 18:15-17

When Jesus was approaching the time of His death, He spoke to His disciples about matters that were closest to His heart. He knew He was about to die. When it comes to matters that involve discord and conflict, we should learn from the examples that Christ himself gave, and apply them to our everyday lives. For we don't know the time in which we leave these earthly bodies.

1.) A personal CONVERSATION. (V.15) Search your own hearts before approaching the matter or theirs (Matthew 7:3). Just between the two of you. We typically talk to a third party (Gossip), we cover it up with the "concern" that we have for them. Then we end it with, "we really should pray for them." We should have genuine concern for them, giving them the opportunity of reconciliation through the means of grace and personal affection. The idea is to provide a means for growth and restitution. Just you and them.

2.) A Prayerful COUNCIL. (v. 16) But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses. After examining your own heart and have approached them personally, the next step is to address the person with a bit more pressure by bringing in a neutral third party. This is, again to bring reconciliation, not astrangment. You are showing that you are serious in bringing a conclusion to this situation and finding forgiveness.

3.) Compassionate CHURCH involvement. (v. 17a) If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church... This avenue is taken when common ground cannot be found. If any of you has a dispute with another, dare he take it before the ungodly for judgment instead of before the saints? Do you not know that the saints will judge the world? And if you are to judge the world, are you not competent to judge trivial cases? Do you not know that we will judge angels? How much more the things of this life! Therefore, if you have disputes about such matters, appoint as judges even men of little account in the church! I say this to shame you. Is it possible that there is nobody among you wise enough to judge a dispute between believers? But instead, one brother goes to law against another—and this in front of unbelievers! The very fact that you have lawsuits among you means you have been completely defeated already. Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated? Instead, you yourselves cheat and do wrong, and you do this to your brothers. 1 Corinthians 6:1-8

Come together in conflict, God will come and be in our midst.
Matthew 18:20 For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them.